The Sound Of The Drums Again

Every so often, I go to the hospital to hear the sound of the drums and horns and simulated car crashes. Weird? Yes, it is. M.R. I. tests for multiple sclerosis are at times  done in this tomb that is almost essential for this test as well as spinal taps etc.
Plus those noises, they put head phones on you that are playing the music of your choice from a radio station. When the noise from the M.R.I is deafening it seems that the music is even louder at the point where you want to scream.
This year I had more difficulty than I ever have had before. I am much shakier and had trouble keeping my head and body still. My mind wandered (a mechanism I have, to leave my body behind while I think of something nicer.) Only this time it didn't work. When my daughter was a teenager she had either a M.R.I or CT Scan and was allergic to the contrast. I didn't recognize her when she came out. Her face was so distorted. I will never forget her father's reaction.To avoid the situation he told me he had to move the car. In my mind, I wanted to move the car. I don't ever want to live that over again, but I did yesterday. The reason was the contrast gave me a cool feeling going through my vein and it smelled like formaldahyde.  I thought for sure I was even being imbalmed.
Needless to say, I survived the test and shouldn't have to have another one for two or three years.
I am increasingly more forgetful. I could have done without those memories yesterday!!

What We Did Years Ago

Before sick-o's ruined my fun, my mother, my sister and I would make all kinds of popcorn balls. I mean tons of popcorn balls. Popcorn balls were my mother's thing for Christmas and Halloween. Orange syrup for Halloween, of course, and red and green for Christmas.
Mother made home made syrup, but I didn't. My syrup got to "hard ball" quickly so you ended up scraping on a cement block for your treat. About  a century ago a syrup made of marshmellows came to save me. The popcorn balls remained soft and delicious.
We gave out apples, candy, and my favorite Milky Way.
The kids's dad always wanted the little ones to give him their candy so that he could "check" it to make sure it was good for them. lol
So every year they would fall for it and willingly give him their little pumpkins. And then the squeals would begin with dad and children fun fighting over the candy.  I was telling Fran about that and he laughed. I could almost see him thinking, "smart man." Towards the later years, the treats ended up being nickels. Where did the fun go?  I handed out nickels a few years ago, and a little boy said, "but don't you have any candy?"  Hmm.

I Would If I Could But I Can't!

I have a "thing" about wearing shoes and jackets. I feel trapped and very uncomfortable.
Today was cruddy outside. It was fifty degrees, too breezy, and drizzly. So of course, we chose today to go to WalMart. About fifteen miles down the highway I started to struggle with my jacket. The jacket was lined with flannel and my shirt was denim trimmed with corduroy. Hmm. There was nothing slippery going on. My brilliant husband let me huff and puff all to no avail. Finally he said, "give me your arm!"  So there was a discussion that lasted until we almost went into the ditch and with me not really screaming but with a very high pitched voice. "If I could get my arm out I wouldn't need your help!"  Needless to say, I walked into WalMart with no jacket and just cuddled up to hubbie.

The Bookcase is full of Memories

Years ago I received a wonderful gift from my daughter. It looked like a big frosted candle jar. It was in fact a frosted glass jar full of memories; my daughter's memories. Inside were slips of paper in three or four different shades of pastel paper with typed memories and one by one put in the jar as she remembered them.

At the time I received that jar, I thought, "How cool." I have kept that jar all these years and have shown it to my friends, but then for several years had forgotten to look at it. I moved it, dusted it occasionally. That was about it.

I have it on display in my bookcase because it is pretty and is surrounded by other memories. A clothespin rocking chair given to my by my oldest son also years and years ago and a picture of my youngest son and Santa and me taken when I worked at a nursing home. That was about thirty years ago.

I was puttering this morning while my computer was getting cleaned out and thought, "I think I will look at those pretty little slips of memories." Well, I got a surprise. Most of her memories I had forgotten. What a shame! They sounded like such fun. I could have cried, however I am so happy that I had made her life happy when she was a child and a young woman.

There were some memories that I think her father made possible. I absolutely know that I would never ever have permitted her to have a telephone in her room.

So my message to you folks is to go through your memory jars, your scrap books, and albums and anything that will job your brain to make you smile, because if you don't someone will beat you to it.

Seek And You Shall Find A Bunch Of Junk

Fran has been on a fall house cleaning jag this fall. Today he bought me some new hangers because we were out after we gave some to his mom when she was in the nursing home. After about fifteen minutes,he brought me two sacks of hangers. And gave me a sarcastic remark about the amount of hangers we had.
The search for hangers got him on a "clean out the closet two hour manic obsessive compulsive "bag up trash out" and a mumbling I think lecture for me." 
However, when I was allowed in there I did see three pairs of boots that he had been looking for, new shirts that hadn't been opened from last year. His turkey hunting mask, 9V batteries, Oh I could go on for hours.
I thought this was so fun. I think his next task should be cleaning out dresser drawers or I could clean out his "stuff" in the shed. That should go over really big.
I should have had the camera out when this was going on, but I don't think that would have been a good idea!!

Do You Have Any Regrets Along The Way?

For many years I worked with the elderly in long term care. I saw that many of them had no family that visited. It was especially noticed at holiday time. We made sure that all residents had gifts at Christmas time. We made sure that there were parties at Easter, St. Patricks Day, and most other holidays like Thanksgiving. I used to worry to some extent that the gifts were generic.  I have seen that in years gone by; gifts were tagged "boy" and "girl for little folks that parents didn't have funds to buy them gifts at holidays.

My brother lived in another state and couldn't come "home" very often. My sister by the time I am talking about had passed on. Before she died she kept my mom company while I was working with the residents.

I remember especially one Mother's Day that I was putting flowers on the tables, watching the families visiting with their folks and felt a pang almost of jealousy. I wanted to be home with my mother. However, if I wanted to keep my job, I had to be at the facility. I found myself looking over my shoulder at an especially large group and didn't see a large spill on the floor and fell very graciously in the coffee.

You all know that I am a very nostalgic person and I talk about my family a lot. Fran has a junk drawer that is sacred to him and I have a "top drawer" that is sacred to me.

Here is a birthday card to me from my mother when she was 82. Note her handwriting. She died when she was 90.  I hope you all have a drawer that is really special to you. In that same drawer I have a letter from my brother. I don't know how old that one is but I am sure it is old. None the less it is saved in the top drawer.