When I was in my younger forties I started working in nursing homes. I lost ten pounds in one week. The stress was unimaginable. I had no idea that “old” people could be in such dire straits. Some people had “frozen” joints. This presented in horrific pain when they were given showers. I would hear the screaming and I thought I would have to quit and find something else to do. A frozen shoulder would mean that they could not lift an arm to be washed underneath. If it was not washed and cleaned then skin irritation could lead to infection etc. But to me hearing all the screaming I would just get sick.
The folks that would get out of their wheelchairs and were at risk of falling would be tied to their wheelchairs and then to the hall railing. They looked like they were in straitjackets. The date of this terror for people was in 1986. “They” said they were mentally ill. “They” were wrong. They either had Alzheimer’s Disease or other types of dementia. In the eighties they closed down the mental health institutes and bus by bus they shipped them to nursing homes. The nursing homes were not equipped to handle the admission numbers. They were happy to fill their beds, but not equipped to fill the physical and emotional needs of their new people. I am making this sound like these poor little folks are animals by saying “shipped”, but that is what happened to them.
I transferred from the first nursing home to a much nicer home with well trained staff. I had learned a lot at the first home, so I was armed with knowledge and compassion for the folks that needed me. As time went on I was able to distinguish between Alzheimer’s Disease and stroke, and other kinds of dementia. I was an Activity Director. I was very much like a school teacher and made lesson plans for “my” residents.
I learned that there was so many different kinds of illnesses that older people were afflicted with and many different ways to deal with them.
Many folks that find themselves in a nursing home are so lonely and depressed. Reasons for this are so varied that it keeps staff on their toes to help them. Some people decided not to get married or to have children. Many of these folks had no visitors. If you looked closely you could see tears in their eyes when others had visitors. It was my responsibility to divert these feelings with activities or tricks of the trade. One of these tricks was Spinoza. Spinoza is a little brown teddy bear that is so soft, you would swear that he is real. You almost always want to hug him when he says, “Hello, my name is Spinoza and I need a friend.” He sings and he says little sentences that are easy to respond to. “Will you be my friend?
Spinoza has cassettes that fit into a zippered fold. He has a little red heart if I remember right, that you press and he starts to sing or talk. I can remember I probably would get into trouble for spending one hundred twenty dollars on him. I didn’t and he was handed to resident after resident that needed the comfort that he had in his little heart.
I think that Spinoza is also used for little folks that may be in the need for a calming influence too.
If any of you have spare time there are so many folks that need volunteers just for visiting, or to send them cards, just some personal attention.
Oh, this is so true and so sad. My grandmother spent her last years in a nursing home. It was a very sad place. It was hard to keep visiting her when it was such a sad place and she couldn't evevn reconize me at the end. I can understand why you lost 10 pounds from stress.
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